Hey Y'All

Friendly warning: most of this stuff is adult content. So if ya don't like it, don't look at it. No, really. We don't sniff around pages we don't like, so don't hate - just stay calm 'n carry on. Have a nice day!

Other Cool Sites We Like

Other Cool Sites We Like
Check out Andy's Free Erotic Cartoons 'n Sexy Comix!

Sunday, 13 April 2014

Gonzo Dawg's Doo-Dah Banned!

Oh, if only this post was as funny as the title!

No, seriously, kidz. It seems that Amazon took a dislike to the more adult aspects of Ms Hellmann's sexy stripper novel, and pulled it from sale completely - damn near killin' our whole account off in the process.

Despite the fact that their own Ts & Cs state, regarding offensive material: "What we find offensive is about what you would expect."

What?

I mean, I find stuff like child abuse offensive. You know, sick, twisted, evil shiz that shouldn't be allowed. Not descriptions of sexy stuff that adults do with each other every single freakin' minute of the day around the world.

If this is how it's gonna be, then they're gonna be very busy over at chez Amazon, pulling all those barely-legal, rape, BDSM, incest, kidnap etc titles that seem to fill up the kinky end of the erotica spectrum over there - the main reason why we recommended the KDP platform to Ms H. in the first place.

So, that was that. We've advised Ms H. to try her luck elsewhere as her book deserves it, though whether our full-colour graphic art will follow her story, is something only her future publisher can decide.

Signin' off, otherwise I'll be ranting here all freakin' week.

Saturday, 30 November 2013

'Crackerz!' 2nd Edition Featuring Snowi Hills Hits Kindle

That's right, kids...we've updated the 'Crackerz!' Amazon Kindle eBook with a whole brand-new strip - technically it's a strip-within-a-strip - featuring the eye-poppingly-endowed Miss Snowi Hills, Pinky's favourite underground comix heroine, who just can't keep her clothes on.



We're workin' on a bunch of other stuff featuring her which you'll only get to see on this very blog type thang, or in eBook form, over the next few weeks 'n months, so she's kind of an exclusive gal.


The eBook's currently on offer for free over at the Amazon place right now and for the next five days, so y'all can check it out. Eventually Snowi will end up with her own series, we reckon, so keep watchin' this spaz. Uh, space.

Monday, 12 August 2013

Check Out 'The Last Shop on the Left'!

Hey y'all,

We know stuff's been quiet hereabouts lately. We still have plenty of things on the backburner, they're just takin' a bit longer than expected to get 'em out there to ya.

In the meantime, our buddy - the mind behind the Styx Rivers 'toons you'll see upon this very blog-type-thing - has just gone an' started up his own creepy horror shop.


Yup, that's right - we thought this was so far up our alley that we just had to plug it (I'm sure there's an eye-watering innuendo in there, somewhere...) - 'cos we're like that.


And to avoid fainting, keep repeating...
it's only a shop
it's only a shop
it's only a shop
...

Sunday, 16 June 2013

Gonzo Film Reviews: Dear God No!

The Intro Bit: This recent entry in the latter-day 'grindhouse rebooted' genre came heavily recommended, with the kind of enthusiasm of a redneck biker for a blonde chick in denim shorts. So I just had to check it out 'cuz, well, it's got bikers an' chicks and splatter 'n stuff...

But is it any good?

I dunno, it's kind of bad in a good way, and good in a bad way. Does that make sense? Maybe not, but I have been drinking a lot of cheap whisky here and I strongly recommend that you do, too, if you choose to view this film - definitely not one to watch while straight, sober or in the company of minors. Or very pregnant chicks, either. Cos there's one mother of a show-stoppin' scene which kinda comes off as somewhere between that bit from Anthropophagus, and a GWAR show. And it's memorable for, if nothing else, the mean-spirited, nasty bloody way in which it's done, as if to rub it in the face of folks everywhere who would think 'Oh but they would never show you THAT...' Oh wait, they just did. You know exactly where you are within the first minutes, which features the aftermath of a very bloody rampage having been inflicted upon the carcasses of a bunch of nuns (thereby slipping in a hint of another beloved exploitation movie genre: the nunsploitation movie). That opening scene will confirm in the mind of the viewer whether or not they're willing to spend the time to get to the end of this movie, or run sobbing to their bedroom to spend the rest of the night Hailing Mary.


The Movie: Now, t'be honest, the acting and the writing ain't exactly Spielberg. But that's not what you watch a film like this for. Good acting would just be distracting, and would be against the spirit in which the movie was made in the first place.

Some movies can get away with being amateurish, pretty badly acted, low-budget, and creaky in the directing department. Just look at the original Last House on the Left. Nobody really knows what they're doing, either behind or in front of the camera - and that's why it works. It doesn't look or feel 'cinematic' and so looks real, like you've actually just unspooled some sicko's snuff film. This movie has some of that grit and grime, though it doesn't overplay the 'crappy old film stock that's been sitting in some guy's toilet since Nixon won his first term' look – a few scratchy jumpy bits in the first reel and then they leave it at that.

Speakin' of Nixon...yeah. I'm not gonna say anymore about that subject but even with prior warning, that scene was still something' of a mindf*ck, brother...a scene so utterly gonzoid and spaced-out in its concept that it's worth the price of admission (or DVD hiring/purchase) alone...


I like bikers. They get a rough ride (heh!) in movies so it's cool to see them given centre stage here. I used to be one myself, before I broke something just once too often and sold my old 650cc beast. And these are the meanest bunch you'll ever see since the Jack Nicholson classic Hells Angels on Wheels, cuz if I remember, that one used members of a real MC in the cast.


DGN! is kind of like that too. It's got good ideas. It's got a bit o' Bigfoot (Bigfoot? Yeah). The main guy is a heavyweight in his own right, and pretty much steals the show. He's a mean, sick bastard but he's kind of cool with it. I actually liked him. He reminds me of the kind of people I used to drink with about 15 years ago in rock bars, but with extra homicidal tendencies. His philosophical monologue at the end is worthy of John Rambo.


The one issue I'd take with this flick is that it's a bit slow. Not nearly as slow as the similar but less effective Run Bitch Run!, but I sometimes think that all these new-wave-exploitation guys could always do with spending a bit more time in the editing suite. Keep things shorter and keep the attention. And if someone really can't act their way out of a wet paper bag - hell, it can be funny for a while but it can also really grate. I like B movies. Also C movies, D movies, all the way up to Z minus movies. I've watched some of the worst and most undiluted bowel-splutterings the world of crazy-ass cinema has to offer, and Dear God No! is a lovable big fat addition to that worthy class of underground, underworld cinema, somewhere between the B and C rankings. Let's call it a B minus: "Pretty good effort, shows promise, could do better."


Gonzo Rating:




Verdict: I'd watch it again, so there's my bottom line: that's a hell of a lot more than I can say for most recent multi-spillion dollar Hollywood efforts of late. I hope they come good on their promise of a sequel. These guys need your support to keep turning out movies that'll have Born Again Christians vomiting blood all over the place. Peace, brother. \o/

Saturday, 1 June 2013

'Crackerz!' Kindle Launch Party a Success! The Dawg is still hungover...

Well, we ran our first Kindle ebook promo during the week with the first anthology of our very own Crackerz! strip. A good bunch o' folks all 'round the world grabbed a copy and we're pleased to know that the Dawg's efforts are now out there in ebook format. An' yeah, during that giveaway we even made it to No. 1 in the Amazon free Comics -> Anthologies chart...

(Shhh...don't tell 'em there were only 3 books in that whole chart...OK?)

Sunday, 26 May 2013

Gonzo Book News Update: 'Crackerz!' Crackz Kindle!

Yo,

Got some happenin' news for y'all. We promised new Gonzo bookz would be hittin' the mighty Amazonian Kindle store soon and, sure enough, the first has just gone live - our first collection of the Crackerz! web comic hosted right here on this very site. We put all the strips t'gether in one neat li'l package so you don't have to.


US Kindle owners can grab it here. 
UK readers, check this out!

(The best thing is...we'll be offerin' this cute li'l baby for FREE for 5 big whole days, starting from Monday 27th!)

There, we gone 'n done it. Our very first official Gonzo Dawg Doo-Dah. There'll be more to come soon, so watch the hell out! Remember, y'all saw it here first. Thanks. Goodnight.

Monday, 20 May 2013

Gonzo Book News!

Yup, stuff's been quiet in the Gonz blog world lately. That's cuz we've been putting together brand new product in the form of a couple o' Kindle e-books exclusively for Amazon.

The first of these is a total head-mash of a bizarro sexy splatterfest by the truly deranged Derek Kobold (his first book, an' all) - he sold the project to us with the tagline "If Jesse Franco snorted some coke and rewrote Frankenstein, it might read a bit like this. Um, if Jesse wrote books, that is." Well, he had us at 'Jesse Franco', kidz, so watch this freakin' space for more nooz of when that one has been finely-tuned an' published. It also sports a spankingly hot cover by the Gonzmeister Himself, which will have to be cruelly censored for Amazon's T&Cs (that's short for 'Terms & Conditions', so don't get excited). But we can show you the original full-on piece, right here, cuz we're like that:


Also in the pipeline is the first volume of our very own Crackerz! stripz, which collects everythin' published here to date but with some editing and tweakin', an' material which'll be exclusive to the e-book edition. An' with bigger, an' revised text too, so it'll actually be readable on one o' those new-fangled tablet gizmos. The Gonz is till workin' on the cover design so we can't show yez a preview yet, still not sure if it's gonna recycle existing art or be something nobody ain't ever seen before.

So stay around, cuz summer's lookin' hot in Gonzo land this year.

Saturday, 20 April 2013

The True Awesome Hotness of Dyanne Thorne

Browsing the web recently and we happened across this fascinating li'l clip of a recent interview with the sexploitationally renowned megavixen herself, Dyanne Thorne AKA Ilsa the she-wolf, tigress, and no doubt a cougar these days as well.

Here's a cute scene of her signing autographs, showing that the lady has never been more popular than she is now (not to mention looking insanely hot in black leather). And a fascinating interview with her and her other half.

Still a she-wolf after all these years...
 If ya don't know who she is, then shame on ya and we suggest you stick around this site a lot more to learn a few things about the classic age of grindhouse cinema! We have a very great fondness for the lady and her notorious character here at GDDDs, as She-Wolf of the SS was one of the first grindhouse movies we ever experienced. And never looked back. (Potentially tasteless, offensive, and perverted in almost every kind of way, it ain't for wusses or the faint of heart so be warned, y'all.)

Dyanne directly inspired the character of Virginia S. Pring AKA Brenda Horne in our very own sexploitation comic Last Gas Pump on the Left.

Thursday, 18 April 2013

Nieves Navarro - Emanuelle & the Last Cannibals

Ya gotta hand it to the Italians. They made exploitation 'n splatter films like nobody else on the planet, before or since. Hell, even their art movies are sick as hell (Pasolini's 120 Days, Satyricon, etc.?), and who else could possibly have come up with the 'cannibal genre', surely the acid test for any wannabe movie gorehound or splatter fan? F'sure, Ruggero Deodato holds the Big Bad Emperor crown, but we think ol' uncle Joe D'amato must've still had a lotta fun with his soft porn/cannibal crossover jungle adventure, Emanuelle & the Last Cannibals AKA Trap Them and Kill Them! (You can tell this is one of the 'bootleg' Emanuelle movies which had no association whatsoever with the Sylvia Kristel classic, since it only has one 'm' in the name).

We just love that alternative title too.  Unlike most other entries in the cannibal genre, there's no disgusting slaughter of native wildlife (we really don't dig that kinda thing - we reckon human actors can do whatever they like in front of a camera to earn their bread, but we draw the line at real killing for entertainment), so it's kind of a 'cannibal lite' effort, suitable for the novice. And any movie which features the natural redhead class of Nieves Navarro (AKA Susan Scott) in some of the hottest stuff she ever did this side of Orgasmo Nero gets our vote. Plus there's the ubiquitous Laura Gemser for y'all to gawk at too, and she always had real problems keeping her bra on at the best of times.

But this post is devoted to the awesome (and we reckon, sadly under-used) Ms Navarro in her final scene, which in its uncut form is still pretty damn harsh, despite some not-so-special effects. She might have had a silicone boob job but we don't care. Respect is due to this fine lady for having the balls to pull this one off so convincingly, and we can barely hope to do justice to her great canny-ball scream queen moment.


Wednesday, 3 April 2013

Camille Keaton - I Spit on Your Grave

Following on the occasional Gonzo Grindhouse Girls series we started with the very popular Christina Lindberg pic, we present another tribute to an iconic revenge heroine. This one should need no introduction. An' if she does then ya may well be hangin' around the wrong interwebsite or have stumbled here by accident!


We always thought Ms Keaton was tragically underused during her rather spotty film career. Although she does have a fun scene in the totally tonto zombie/kung-fu cross-genre classic Raw Force. Last time we looked that movie was free to view on Youtube but ya never know with that site, stuff appears and vanishes all the time...but anything with this classy redhead lady is worth checkin' out. So sez we all.